Now a novice like Deep would say something like 'Purple People Eater.'
I however feel that we're more likely to see a one-eyed, one-horned, flying Purple People-Eater LONG before the Rupert Holmes song 'Escape (the Pina Colada Song)' ever becomes true.
First, to show that I can use Wikipedia as well as any rival music column- the song was the last #1 song of the 1970s and the second #1 song of the 1980s (it fell to #2 for one week- thus becoming the answer to a trivia question).
For those of you who don't recall the lyrics-
I was tired of my lady, we'd been together too long.
Like a worn-out recording, of a favorite song.
So while she lay there sleeping, I read the paper in bed.
And in the personals column, there was this letter I read:
'If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
I'm the lady you've looked for, write to me, and escape.'
I didn't think about my lady, I know that sounds kind of mean.
But me and my old lady, had fallen into the same old dull routine.
So I wrote to the paper, took out a personal ad.
And though I'm nobody's poet, I thought it wasn't half-bad.
'Yes, I like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
I'm not much into health food, I am into champagne.
I've got to meet you by tomorrow noon, and cut through all this red tape.
At a bar called O'Malley's, where we'll plan our escape.'
So I waited with high hopes, then she walked in the place.
I knew her smile in an instant, I knew the curve of her face.
It was my own lovely lady, and she said, 'Oh, it's you.'
And we laughed for a moment, and I said, 'I never knew'..
'That you liked Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
And the feel of the ocean, and the taste of champagne.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
You're the love that I've looked for, come with me, and escape.'
'If you like Pina Coladas, and getting caught in the rain.
If you're not into yoga, if you have half-a-brain.
If you like making love at midnight, in the dunes of the cape.
You're the love that I've looked for, come with me, and escape.'
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For those of you who are married- try this- answer a personals ad. Be sitting at the location when the other party shows up- and it's your significant other...
Your first reaction will be.....laughter? Both of you had better have had a LOT of Pina Coladas for that to happen, and even then...the sequel song about the next day won't be nearly as civil.
I implore everyone reading this to try this, and let me know the results- in fact post the hilarious results on Youtube- you'll go viral. Trust me on this one.
-Zjabs (Rochester's Official Columnist)
© 2012 Zjabs - 4/28/12
