My boat finally came in. You can all kiss my butt. I am going off and finding a Libertarian paradise and you can all sit here with your government regulations. I am going to tell everyone in my life what I really think of them and burn the bridges. I don't need any of you any longer. I got the following email yesterday, and have sent all the necessary information-
----------------------------------------------------
The Manager of Audit and Account Department,
African Development Bank/ A.D.B.
Ouagadougou, Burkina-Faso.
Dear Friend, TOP SECRET
I hope that you are well today.I am the Manager of Audit and account
dept,ofour bank.So with due respect, i decided to contact you over this
businessfinancial transaction worth the sum of TWENTY TWO MILLION THREE
HUNDREDTHOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS ($22,300,000m) in other to
entrust
this fundinto your bank account.
This is an abandoned fund that belongs to the one
of our bank customers who died along with his entire family on 25th
July,2000 in a plane crash disaster. I was very fortune to meet the
deceased
file
when i was arranging the old and abandoned customers files of 2000-2001
in other to submit to the bank managements accordingly for
documentation
purposes. Following our banking financial policy, it was obviously
indicated
and signed law fully that if such money remains unclaimed after five
years
without somebody been a foreigner apply and claim the fund as the next
of
kin , the money will be transferred into the Bank Treasury as an
unclaimed
fund. So the request of you as a foreigner is necessarily needed for
the
claim because a citizen of Burkina Faso cannot come forward to claim
the
fund since the law does not pave a way for an indigene to claim such
fund.
Since the real beneficary of the fund died , the bank are expecting the
next of kin to apply for the release of the fund for him or her without
delay but unfortunately i learnt through the investigations which I
carried
out that there is nobody behind who can come and claim the
fund.Therefore
I want you to apply to the bank with your reliable bank account details
where our bank will transfer the fund into, and immediately the fund is
transferred into your account ,we will share the fund according to the
percentage
ratio below.
SIXTY FIVE PERCENT (65%) of the total fund will be for me.TWENTY FIVE
PERCENT(
25%) for you in provision of the Bank account.FOUR PERCENT(4%) will be
for
unexpected expenses which may occur during the transfer.SIX PERCENT(6%)
will be preserved for helping the helpless people, like charity
organization
and motherless babies. Thereafter you will help me to visit your
country
for sharing the money according to the percentage indicated above. So
for
the immediate transfer of this fund into your bank account as arranged,
you must apply first to the bank as the only existing next of kin to
the
deceased customer and after approval which will take place immediately
as
you applied, the transfer of the fund into your nominated bank account
will
proceed. Please note that you should keep this business secret until
you
confirm the transfer into the bank account which you will provide. And
there
is NO RISK in this business. The bank will forward to you all necessary
documents related to the transfer and which will prove that you make a
legal
claim of inheritance.
It is true that i prayed before i was pushed forward to contact you for
this business but i want you to pray also and assure me solemnly that
you
are a trsutwothy,reliable,honest and capable to avoid cheating me in
this
business.
If you are really sure of your integerity,reply me for my ulternative
email
box (ali_musa222@yahoo.com) immediately for more detailed information
for
how the process to transfer the fund into your account will be.
Yours faithfully,
Mr. Musa Danladi.
----------------------------------------------
So screw off, all of you. I'll be thinking of your sad pathetic little lives while I'm living it up. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
-Zjabs (Rochester's Official Columnist)
PS. I'm going to swindle this loser as well- he said I can claim twenty-two million three hundred thousand, but then writes it as $22,300,000m which is actually quite a bit more. Bill Gates, F you.... MAYBE you can be my butler. It's good to be king....
© 2004 david zjaba - 12/12/04
