The sleeping psychiatrist revisited
My therapist looks at me.
'Greg, you simply must see Dr. Ferber. He's the best psychiatrist this side of the city. Yes, it's a bit of a ride, but he's well worth it.'
So I drive to Rockland County, New York, to see Doctor Ferber.
The dude is incredibly old. But I am fine with that, at first.
Doctor Ferber leads me through many tricky childhood memories, and seems to have some pretty good insights.
Then I hear a familiar sound. I look over at the doctor and he is sound asleep, and he is snoring loudly.
I look at my watch. 40 minutes to go, at a hundred forty dollars an hour, uninsured!
' Doctor, I never told anyone this. I stabbed my mother when I was 12.'
' And Dr, I have 40 young boys buried in the crawl space of my house.'
Then I began to wonder if the doctor secretly taped the sessions. So I shut the hell up.
Sat for the rest of the hour, silent. Left a check for $140 on his lap.
Came back the next week. Same !*&!@! Absolutely identical. Pissed away another $140. But it wasn't going to happen again.
Returned to my therapist, and she was so excited. She had to know how it went with Dr Ferber.
And oh how I told her.
Seeing as how I had to see a psychiatrist if I were to get medications, we finally found one that worked out okay. And the new one stayed awake! That was so much more than I expected.
Dr Ferber if you are reading this, send me a refund for $280, I could use the dough.
© 2015 amnesiac - 7/24/16