THAT SELF-CENTERED SON OF A BITCH

Meant as a compliment…

We each and every one see the World through our own eyes.  Ditto the other senses.  For example, if we get into a mutually-accusatory argument over who farted, how do I know it’s your fart or not some man’s behind the curtain or that I have a brain tumor in some olfactory lobe?  Point being – we necessarily rely on our own senses. Even when I hear you sheepishly say, “It’s the guy behind the curtain” I have simply transferred my judgment to the audio input of your lying voice.  Egocentric, homocentric…Son of a bitch!

While on the subjects of sheepdogs, It crosses my mind that animals are people too.  Their brains are generally smaller and less capable of complex thought – but even this is a highly homocentric observation.  For all we (don’t) know – there are myriad selves far superior to us humans.  I’m even convinced that plants have thoughts and feelings too…they just move really sloooowwly so we get bored trying to communicate with them.

This should have profound implications regarding our posits of self, intro/extroversion, others, heaven, hell, nature and the moral implications of eating to excess.

I end this installment with sincere questions:

            -Should a human be allowed to marry his pet animal?

            -Should a human be allowed to marry himself?

            -Can I will my estate to my favorite chair?

            -Do the (other) animals go to heaven or hell?

            -Can an owner be charged with abusive treatment of his pet rock?

            -Is an orchid superior to a tulip?

            -Holy Cow – really?

            -If vastly-superior space aliens descend, should we surrender as pets?

            -Would I then be able to piss on a hydrant with impunity?

            -If a clown gets laryngitis does he become a mime?

            -If a mime sneezes – does it make a sound?

 

I’m not claiming to be an exbert on this stuff; I leave this to other WOTLers.

Enlightenment welcome.

Thanks!

Tom – The Ponderer – “I ponder around and around and around….”  Duh-duh, duh-duh, duh-duh…duh…

© 2013 Thomas Dey - 10/15/13


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