by Just Lynne

# 1. 11/29/13 6:17 PM by No
I am sorry. Your words gave me pause. Our aunt that lived with us- always wanted to help, and I felt like a terrible host, for allowing her to help. Mea Culpa! I am sure- she felt pushed out of place. Just so you know- you can stand in my kitchen and laugh while we do the dishes anytime.

Editor's Note: Thanks, No, I might take you up on that if I get too distressed over being kicked to the curb!

# 2. 11/29/13 9:36 PM by Tom Thomas - Rochester,NY
You have not been kicked to the curb . You have been promoted to Supervisor!

Editor's Note: I never thought of it that way, Tom, LOL.

# 3. 11/29/13 11:59 PM by BIFF
My parents have also been asked to step aside while their children and grandchildren do things for them. The way I see it is they taught their children to respect their parents and elders, to let them rest and enjoy themselves, while the younger and more able-bodied do the tasks that they once did for the younger ones.

I suggest you make someone step aside so you can help. She may have trouble saying NO to a respected elder.

Editor's Note: Good idea, because I would rather be doing the dishes than listen to everybody's aches and pains, Biff.

# 4. 11/30/13 5:54 AM by Nick - Irondequoit, NY
You should instead think of it as Elder Privilege.

Editor's Note: I wish I could, I still feel young and want to be part of the laughing and carrying on I guess, Nick.

# 5. 11/30/13 7:55 AM by Marilyn
I really bet the girls think they are doing you a favor. BE like me - I just barge in. lol. Thanks for sharing "feelings"

Editor's Note: I bet they do too, Marilyn, but I can't see myself barging in - you know how it is, they love me but don't see me as part of their little clique.

# 6. 11/30/13 8:38 AM by little john - Mount Morris, NY
thumbsup.gif I enjoyed your column and in rereading it thought about how I too can relate...

As time marched on, I too was left standing at the curb, wondering why, I wasn't needed. I think the word needed was my trigger. I had always been the go to person, in many different ways...

When I felt I wasn't needed, I let myself believe that somehow I was less of a person, less of a man than what I used to be...

It has taken me a long time to adjust to another role in this part of my life. I have learned to cope with the change of "status" from needed, to one who is wanted, and found that my own perception of need and want have evolved with the sands in the big hourglass of life...

I enjoyed the other comments also and have taken a little wisdom from all who share their thoughts here on WOTL...

There is still something waiting for all of us to do in life... We just need to find out what the new mission of our journey through life may be, and then follow that dream, so to speak...

Happy Belated Thanksgiving from a fellow writer on WOTL...


Editor's Note: I hear you, lj, I was always the "go-to" person too, I think that's why I'm having problems with learning to be on the sidelines. I guess my best bet is to hope that I'm still "wanted".

# 7. 11/30/13 8:39 AM by Mark - Greece
We anxiously await the day any one of our 30-something age kids volunteer to take over hosting Thanksgiving dinner. As it is, we are working days ahead of time and all Thanksgiving day so they can roll in and almost immediately up to the table. We use this clean-up time to play with grandkids so that the adults feel they've 'contributed' to the day.

Editor's Note: Heehee, Mark, I do have to say that I am glad my daughter has taken over Thanksgiving, as I was tired of turkeys. After reading all the advice I have gotten, I have decided to enjoy supervising and let them do all the work and put my feet up on the nearest chair and relax.

# 8. 11/30/13 9:39 AM by Growel E.
Without a doubt Lynne, you have left loving memories in the hearts of those you have served in the past, as well as the full tummies.

Editor's Note: Thanks, Growel, I sure hope so! I worked hard at that.

# 9. 11/30/13 9:31 PM by mk
Sorry, Lynne - my phone autocorrected my name mk to No . My apologies.

Editor's Note: I was wondering who "no" was, mk, LOL.

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