by Just Lynne

# 1. 12/26/12 6:23 PM by albert 1
It's never too late to find a compatible mate.

I Am 74 years old and my significant other is one year younger.

Mary Elizabeth (AKA Tar Baby) and I hooked up three years ago thanks to a website called Classmates.

She was one year behind me in school and I had not seen her in over fifty years when we cautiously became more than just good friends.

You could do it also when you find the right formula to find the right person.

Have you ever attended a class reunion?

We went to one three years ago and saw the potential for people who needed others of beginning friendships/

Editor's Note: No, I've never been to a reunion, Albert, I graduated from Dover, NJ, and moved up here to Roch and never heard from anybody down there again. My family moved away from there so they probably couldn't find me if they did have a reunion. Anyway, I think I am just trying to settle into my life as it is and that's why I like to write about it. Maybe there other women going through the same thing! LOL You and your significant other are lucky to have met again after all those years, goodluck to you both!

# 2. 12/27/12 8:58 AM by dave
Love your columns! This one isn't so much about being old as it is about being alone. 'Old' is nothing more than a point of reference, anyway. When I was 10, 20 was old. When I was 30, 50 was old. Now I'm older than 39 (by a few years) and you know what, the older I get, the farther away my reference of 'old' gets!

If there are no eligible men in your retirement community, maybe you can meet others in town or at some other social functions. Take PuttPutt and go cruising the golf course! And really, what gent could possibly resist your cutie of a dog and the cutie you are?

Editor's Note: Aha! I never thought of the golf courses, Dave. But you are right, it is more about being alone than being old, I guess I can't be too old if I still wish I had a man around. I guess me and PuttPutt need to take a ride when the weather breaks. LOL.

# 3. 12/27/12 11:10 AM by Cameron L. De Vries - Shanghai, China
I can't even imagine life without my wife/best friend. I naturally enjoy life (or try to). Tastes, smells, good movies and music, outdoor activities, etc. For me, the greatest enjoyment is sharing these experiences with others, and my wife is at the top of the list.

I know the previous 2 comments have posited the possibility of meeting someone else, which I think is a great idea. I might add, though, the person lucky enough to spend time with you is also longing to share life's experiences. And now it is with the benefit of having the rich perspectives and wisdom that comes from someone at your stage in life.

I appreciate your columns and perspectives.

Editor's Note: Thanks, Cameron, and I think you are very lucky to have your wife and enjoy life with her. So is she! I hope I find someone who wants to share life's experiences, no luck so far but maybe I'm looking in the wrong places!

# 4. 12/27/12 6:00 PM by deep water
hi Lynne! focus on the positives if you can. my dad, Neptune who used tow rite her found Emotional Wave, who used to write her, when they were both past 70, and have been terrfic for each other. or maybe form your own social group that likes to do things you do. keep your chin up!

Editor's Note: Hi Deep. I wonder why Neptune and Emotional Wave stopped writing here? I wish we had more people on board. I got after my friends and family and had good readership on my last two columns, but I'm not sure it will continue unless I keep after everybody which I hate to have to do.

# 5. 12/27/12 10:20 PM by deep water
neither one liked the harshness that ensues sometimes, and Neptune is as far left as a leftfielder and you know how democrats get treated here.

Editor's Note: Well it does get harsh and argumentative, which is why I am trying to get more women on here, who tend to write more about the emotional side of life. I figure then we might be more balanced. And yes I do know how they treat democrats on here. I'm not a democrat and I left the Republican party, also I rarely write about politics, so I still feel safe. LOL

# 6. 12/28/12 9:09 PM by little john - Mount Morris, NY
thumbsup.gif Not sure if this is anything you'd like to try...

One of my tools for coping with PTSD and my "social" anxiety, is to make a concerted effort to go out once a week to eat at a small private owned restaurant, where the waitresses and the cook have gotten to know me...

I often invite a friend to go with me and I treat. I call it "Chuck Wagon" therapy which happens to be the name of the rustic restaurant...

It may cost $20 for an hour of very limited courteous caring companionship, but it makes me feel better as well as my friends I treat, and the waitresses enjoy knowing they have made an Amish Veteran's day with a simple small senior serving of char broiled chopped sirloin, and french fries with brown gravy, and a side of cottage cheese...And coffee with cream... I leave a generous tip for they all have smiles and are way more therapeutic to me than any psychiatrist has ever been...

I even go alone some times, I enjoy to eat, observe and smile, and I am amazed at how many reciprocal smiles I can get with just a nod of my head and the hat that says, "Vietnam Veteran"... I try to do nothing more than be a nice guy, finishing last, and I am already feeling so blessed by my life, I am happy...

Amazing how a good meal can make a guy feel better. And then I usually sleep better, no dreams, and wake up better the next day...

It may not work for everybody, but it works for me...

Just to share...God Bless...

Editor's Note: Sounds like a really good plan to me. I don't currently have troubles with social anxiety as I live in a retirement community and we are busy with various activities and we eat out together a lot, but I went through something similar after my husband died. Just stayed in the house alone, took me over a year to pull up my britches and sell my house and move into this community. So I hear what you're saying. It's good to hear how you are coping, and that you are back in the stream of life after all you've been through.

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